Learning To Love

                                                         (Photograph copyright of John Paul Bender)

One of the hardest things in life is learning and coming to accept that the way you think is not always the way someone else thinks. In high school I gave a persuasive speech about my stance on gay marriage thinking that I could shift my classmate's opinions to be more aligned with mine.  I was met with both agreement and disagreement on my viewpoint.  And now, once again, I stepped into the waters of this heated issue by sharing my opinion about the same-sex marriage decision that was recently made by SCOTUS in Facebook comments.

The world and its sports, music, emotions and politics are all channeled through social media. Nothing is private anymore. Everyone has to tell everyone else where they stand on everything under the sun even if what they post becomes offensive to others. Seeing my Catholic faith being criticized in Facebook posts for the Church's defense against SCOTUS's decision to legalize same-sex marriage in all fifty states, brought out a desire for me to try to give some of my friends and family members a better understanding of why we as a church believe what we believe. I would comment on a status with an attempt to show a person why the Church is so upset over the ruling, only to be ridiculed and told that I am posting radical and passive aggressive thoughts. It saddened me as I found myself "unfriending" a large amount of my friends who were celebrating the outcome.

In trying to make my opposition clear, I heard the phrase, "This is the reason why people fall away from the Catholic Church, because you can't tolerate opinions that are different than your own." As a result, I feel the need to revisit humility. Instead of chastising, I think we need to take a step back and reassess the need for kindness, humility and love. Our reasoning behind our defense is legitimate, but words get in the way. In our efforts to lead someone to the truth, we can end up damaging feelings and lose a number of potential disciples. A great friend of mine once said, " Real love is not being able to have all the answers, but rather crawling down into the hole that someone has dug themselves into and being present with them."  A loving embrace, a heartfelt prayer and great courage and patience can go a long way in bringing someone out of the darkness and into the light of truth. 

Intent on improving the way I bring about truth in the world, I'm going to try a new approach to evangelizing. I am still going to promote my love for the Catholic faith and Catholic teachings, but rather than try and engage with others about differences in opinion, I am going to take a step back and allow them to discover God's will on their own. Instead of trying to teach with my words, I'm going to focus more on living out my faith to the best of my ability. I feel I can make the most impact on someone who is searching for truth in this way. The old saying "actions speak louder than words" still holds very true.

Yes, I think the same-sex marriage decision is terrible and I do not stand for or agree with it, but I think that the most important thing we can do is to love one another regardless of differing beliefs and opinions. We need to learn to love again and forgive again even when it hurts to do so.  How will you continue to show your love for those around you who disagree with you?

A Pilgrimage To Remember

Yesterday my girlfriend Morgan and I joined the rest of my family on a pilgrimage to the Shrine of Christ's Passion in St John, Indiana. Rather than take a bus, my family all crammed into one car and drove straight down ourselves. Two and a half hours in a car together doesn't always paint a pretty picture but we were all buzzing with excitement for what the day would hold!

The pilgrimage began with Mass celebrated by Bishop Donald Hying of Gary, Indiana, a close family friend and assisted by Father Anthony Jelenik at St. John the Evangelist. Recently built in 2008, St. John the Evangelist was absolutely gorgeous which may seem strange when we often consider modern churches. Connecting both the old churches of the parish with biblical symbolism, we all felt that this was the perfect worship space for the beginning of our celebration.

                            (The outside of St. John the Evangelist- St John, IN. Copyright John Paul Bender)

                                         (Blessed Virgin Mary statue outside of St. John's. Copyright John Paul Bender)

                                                             (The interior of St John's. Copyright John Paul Bender)

                                                          (The Altar of St. John's. Copyright John Paul Bender)

                                                       ( The presider's chair of St. John's. copyright John Paul Bender)

                         (The tabernacle is two sided. It can be opened from the front and back. Copyright John Paul Bender)

                      (Of course you can't miss a picture with our very much missed bishop: Copyright John Paul Bender)

Eloquently speaking as always, Bishop Hying talked about Pentecost and the importance of the Holy Spirit in our lives. He noted that without the Holy Spirit, the apostles would have stayed in the upper room, Peter probably would have gone back to fishing; the only thing he had ever known, and we would never have existed beyond that point as a universal church.

 Despite all of the fear and negativity in the upper room though, the Holy Spirit breathed in the apostles a renewed love and zeal for the Lord, courage to be able to share all of the teachings of the Messiah, and to make disciples of all nations. It was precisely why pilgrimages are essential to our faith journey. Pilgrimages help us to be reinvigorated in the truth and awe of the Gospel, to be reminded that we can not shy away from evangelizing to others, and to dive deeper into our own individual relationship with Christ.

Right behind the majestic parish is the Shrine of Christ's Passion. The shrine is full of life size stations of the cross set on a vast piece of farm land. Each station was complete with perfectly hand- crafted statues of Christ, Pontius Pilate, the Roman soldiers, Veronica, Mary and Simon of Cyrene with music from local artists and narrations by NBC news anchor Bill Curtis. Fr. Anthony joined our pilgrimage and inspired our group with powerful and emotion-filled reflections. Below are pictures that I took of each station of the shrine and the surrounding scenery.

                                          (Gathered around the table at the Last Supper:Copyright John Paul Bender)

                                                     (In the Garden of Gethsemane: Copyright John Paul Bender)

                                                 (Jesus being judged by Pontius Pilate: Copyright John Paul Bender)

                                                        (Christ carries His cross: Copyright John Paul Bender)

                                                                             (Copyright: John Paul Bender)

                                                 (Jesus looks with gratitude upon Simon: Copyright John Paul Bender)

                                                      (Veronica wiping the face of Jesus: Copyright John Paul Bender)

                                                      ( Jesus consoles the women. Copyright John Paul Bender)

                                                                              (Copyright John Paul Bender)

                                                          ( Jesus nailed to the cross. Copyright John Paul Bender)

                                                        ( The Crucifixion of Jesus. Copyright John Paul Bender ) 

                                             ( Fr. Anthony prostrating in front of Jesus. Copyright John Paul Bender)

                                                  (Pieta- Christ in His Mother's arms. Copyright John Paul Bender)

                                                   (Christ being laid into the tomb. Copyright John Paul Bender)

                                                          (Entering the tomb. Copyright John Paul Bender)

                                                   (Christ appears to Mary Magdalene. Copyright John Paul Bender)

                                                     ( Christ ascends to heaven. Copyright John Paul Bender)

After walking through the beautiful grounds of the Shrine of Christ's Passion, we decided to pay a visit to original St. John the Evangelist church in Lake Country. Built in the form of a log cabin, the church was converted into a 24 hour Eucharistic Adoration chapel. Hands down, it was the most beautiful Eucharistic chapel I have ever set foot in.

                                  (St John the Evangelist Eucharistic Adoration Chapel. Copyright John Paul Bender)

                                 ( St John the Evangelist Eucharistic Adoration Chapel. Copyright John Paul Bender)

After all was said and done I believe this was easily the best pilgrimage I have ever been on! As a family we got to say hello to an old friend in Bishop Donald Hying, we got to attend Mass in a beautiful church at St. John the Evangelist which puts some of our churches in Milwaukee to shame, and we had the opportunity to walk with Jesus Christ as he carried our sins on a cross for us.

I strongly encourage you to attend the Shrine of Christ's Passion, and the city of St. John, Indiana. You will never forget the experience that you will have and you will see God's love for you in a totally different and overwhelming way.

Blessings to you on this Solemnity of Pentecost!

Duc In Altum: Put Out Into The Deep Discernment Retreat With Bishop Donald Hying

This past weekend I went on a silent discernment retreat at Saint Francis de Sales Seminary. It had been quite a while since I had been on one. The retreat was called Duc In Altum, which literally means,  to "put out into the deep" and although I didn't realize that it was a silent retreat when I signed up to go, it was exactly what I needed at this moment in my life. The weekend was led by Bishop Donald Hying, a great man whom I also consider a wonderful friend and spiritual guide and is soon to be the next bishop of the Diocese of Gary, Indiana.

For myself personally, I have had a difficult time discerning what the next steps are that God is calling me to take regarding re-entering seminary. This retreat was extremely fruitful in a sense that it reminded me that I am not alone in my discernment, and reaffirmed my trust in God, that He would never leave my side, even when the life decisions that I make are not always comfortable or easy.

Each day of the retreat featured the Liturgy of Hours, Mass celebrated by Bishop Hying, and the rector of the seminary, Fr. John Hemsing, listening to a series of conferences by the Bishop and participating in a beautiful Eucharistic all night vigil.

In one of his talks Bishop Hying spoke about a common conversation that he has with young people.
Often he will ask a man or woman what they want to do with their life and being put on the spot, they are unable to think of their greatest dreams and desires. The common response that follows is that they want to go to a good school. When the Bishop asks them why this is important to them, they answer, "In order to get a good job so as to have a comfortable life." Finally the Bishop concludes the questioning, " Then what do you hope to do after that?" Usually there is hardly or no response at all.

As a young man discerning what I should do with my life, there are so many options that it can be very overwhelming. Often times I feel lost or confused about what I should do especially while living in a world that constantly encourages moving upwards in life, making a lot of money, gaining popularity, success, prestige and human admiration, while adding as much material possessions as I can to my life.

Christ on the other hand calls us to move downwards, to give all our money away, to die to self in order to put others first, to subtract the comfort from our lives so He can fill us with all that we truly need to grow in faith and love.

This retreat was such a beautiful reminder of the need to make myself open and available to the will of God whatever it is that I am being called to do. Going on this retreat also reminded me of what great friends and support that I have from the community of people I have come to know. I really recommend making a retreat at least once in your life. Not only is it a great way to grow in community with others who share your desire to do God's will, but in the world of great distractions and upward vision, it's a perfect opportunity to enter into silence and allow God to speak to your heart.

Milwaukee-40 Days For Life Eucharistic Procession with Bishop Donald Hying, Pro-life Wisconsin and Roses For Our Lady

On Sunday November 16th, Pro-Life Wisconsin's State Director-Elect Dan Miller, Bishop Donald Hying of the Archdiocese of Milwaukee and Roses For Our Lady President Anne Bender, led a Eucharistic Procession beginning in front of the Affiliated Medical Services building on Milwaukee's Eastside. The procession concluded with Benediction inside the Womens Care Center directly across the street.

The event was a fitting way to end the fall season of the Milwaukee 40 Days for Life campaign as we began by praying outside of a place of death and despair in the abortion mill, and finished inside a peaceful sanctuary of life and hope in the Womens Care Center.

 As we enter into these coming winter months, please keep all women in your prayers who are faced with the difficult situation of an unplanned pregnancy, that they may choose to give their children life and convince others to do the same. It is extremely encouraging to see so many people, young people included, supporting the pro-life cause and feeling compelled to share information with anyone who will listen. Your courage and strength is so inspiring! Keep up the great work!

 Please take a moment to watch this video, share it with your family and friends and continue to spread the Gospel of Life with all you come in contact with.

Bishop Donald Hying Film Debut on December 8th at the Majestic Theater

Via Imprisoned In My Bones-

Ahava Productions presents it's film debut featuring Bishop Donald Hying, Auxiliary Bishop of the Archdiocese of Milwaukee, on Monday, December 8th, 2014 at the Marcus Majestic Theater in Brookfield, Wisconsin.  Yes, that's Bishop Hying on the BIG SCREEN!

The evening will begin with Mass celebrated by Bishop Hying for the Feast of the Immaculate Conception at 5:30 pm followed by the showing at 6:15 pm.  The $5.00 tickets are available for purchase now and will sell fast!  Order soon!  This is an event you won't want to miss!  A ticket is required to attend.

To order your ticket, please visit this link:  
http://www.brownpapertickets.com/event/917661

These Ahava Productions Anima films are described as follows:  "...a series of films that help us break through the noise of our everyday life in order to hear the voice of truth and love. Each film in the series guides us on an inward journey of self-reflection and wonder. The short movies feature Auxiliary Bishop Donald Hying as he incorporates the word of God, original music, and the highest level of cinematography."

Following the film debut, these films will be available via download on the Ahava Productions website and should be ready to purchase following the December 8th debut.  The films have been picked up by the largest distributor of Catholic goods and will be on DVD and sold in every Catholic bookstore, Christian bookstore, Barnes and Noble, parishes, etc.

Archbishop Listecki Entrusts Archdiocese of Milwaukee to Mary at Hearts United 2014

For three days, October 5th, 6th, and 7th, hundreds of Catholics from all over the Archdiocese attended Hearts United 2014 at Christ King parish in Wauwatosa hosted by the Rosary Evangelization Apostolate. The three day mission featured dynamic speakers in Bishop Donald Hying, Auxiliary Bishop of Milwaukee, Fr. Jim Kubicki the National Director of the Apostleship of Prayer, Fr. Peter Ryan, Executive Director of the Office of Doctrine for the USCCB and Janis Clarke, a Lay Evangelist.  Confession, Eucharistic Adoration and Benediction were part of the mission which concluded with a beautiful Entrustment of the Archdiocese of Milwaukee by Archbishop Listecki during Mass on the Feast of Our Lady of the Rosary.

As a young adult Catholic, I can honestly say that it was so inspiring to attend this powerful and spiritual event and see so many members of the Archdiocese of Milwaukee come together to honor the Blessed Virgin Mary. It was very encouraging to see so many evangelical groups such as Roses For Our Lady, Arise Milwaukee, Safe Teen Zone, Catholic Memorial High School and many large families lead the church in each decade of the Rosary, and St. Sebastian Parish Choir lead us in song. It is events like these that give the young people of the local church in Milwaukee hope, seeing the church so alive, faithfully placing our trust in the Blessed Virgin Mary. Our prayer,with Mary as our guide, is that we continue to do the work of the Lord with zeal and vigor, assisting others on their journey to Heaven.

Our Lady of the Rosary, pray for us!

For more information about the Rosary Evangelization Apostolate and the other awesome events that they host and plan, please visit www.rosaryea.org

(All photos courtesy of Terry Boldin)

A Blessed Week of Honoring Our Blessed Mother

                                                         Photo Copyright: John Paul Bender

We've had two days this week honoring the Blessed Virgin Mary-Monday, September 8th having been the Birth of Mary and today the Feast of Her Most Holy Name. What a beautiful week in which to honor the Mother of the human race and of our Lord Jesus Christ!

                                                           Photo Courtesy of Terry Boldin

On Monday night, Roses For Our Lady celebrated the Birth of Our Mother with a beautiful Mass and outdoor rosary procession at Divine Mercy Parish in South Milwaukee. Presiding at the liturgy was Bishop Donald Hying along with assisting priests: Fr. Bob Betz, Pastor at Divine Mercy, Fr. Tim Kitzke, Pastor of Three Holy Women and native son of the hosting parish, and Fr. Luke Strand, Vocation Director for the Archdiocese of Milwaukee. 

                                                            Photo Courtesy of Terry Boldin

In his homily, Bishop Hying addressed the importance of having a relationship with our Blessed Mother, "Look to our Mother for strength and inspiration for how we are to live as disciples. Her initial courage and acceptance of God's plan to give birth to Jesus and her encouragement to the apostles to go and make disciples of all nations after His resurrection should be the model of how to be a perfect follower."

                                                             Photo Courtesy of Terry Boldin

Mary was definitely with us as 400 people processed with the Eucharist through the neighborhood praying the rosary by candlelight in the late evening. Getting looks of confusion from the neighbors peering through windows and trailing with cameras was intimidating but the message of courage that Our Blessed Mother evokes surely shone through in all who were present. With Mary as our inspiration we will never have to be afraid. Let us continue bringing a message of hope to a nation that is still struggling to know Her son.  

                                                               Photo By John Paul Bender

Please join Roses For Our Lady this Sunday, September 14th, for their monthly holy hour for vocations at 2pm at Holy Rosary Parish on Milwaukee's East Side led by Fr. Enrique Hernandez. 

Happy Feast Day!

                                                   Photo Courtesy of Terry Boldin

"Passion For The Gospel & Service To Others": Recap of A Morning Reflection on Charity & Justice With Bishop Donald Hying

                                                (Photo Courtesy of Fr. Paul Hartmann)

Recently I attended a wonderful morning reflection on the issues of charity and justice with Bishop Donald Hying. Over 200 people from around the Archdiocese of Milwaukee gathered at St. James Parish in Menomonee Falls for the second installment of workshops put together by the Social Justice Ministry of the Archdioceses and neighboring parishes.

Leading off the morning of formation, Bishop Hying made a point of emphasizing that as Catholics we must have a burning passion for the Gospel and answer the call to bring the Good News to others.  Quoting the 1971 Synod of Bishops, Bishop Hying recalled that, "working for peace and justice is constitutive (meaning that it is an integral part) of the Gospel." This should be the mission that everyone should work towards.

There were so many interesting workshops to attend during the morning that it was hard to decide which one I should sit in on especially since they were all going on at the same time.

         Workshop A: St. Vincent DePaul "Coming Together to Get Ahead"
         Workshop B: Recruiting Volunteers
         Workshop C: Starting a Human Concerns Committee
         Workshop D: Inspiring People in Your Parish With Catholic Social Teaching
         Workshop E: JustFaith- Helping Individuals Experience Conversion
         Workshop F: Moving From Charity to Justice
         Workshop G: Faithful Citizenship in Polarized Times
         Workshop H: Youth on/in Mission

One of the things I had been bring to prayer long before attending this event was having an interest in mission work or going on mission trips. Naturally I wanted to attend the Youth on/in Mission workshop hosted by Directors of Youth Ministry, Claire Hoffmeyer and Bryan Ramsey at St. James, St. John Vianney and Good Shepherd parishes.

Both directors were on fire for the faith and genuinely wanted to make a difference in young people's lives by giving them opportunities for building up communities, volunteering time and service and designing and developing mission trips for faith growth. Both Claire and Bryan explained some of the encouraging aspects of their work with youth as well as some of the challenges that come with it.
I ask that you please keep Claire, Bryan, all youth ministers and young adult coordinators in your prayers as they continue to work hard to further instill the faith in our young people.

The next Morning of Formation for Charity and Justice with Bishop Hying will be held in Fond du Lac with more details to follow on the finalized date to follow.

If you wish to contact Claire and/or Bryan with questions, information or a desire to help them in their mission please see below.

                                                                        Bryan Ramsey                                                                                Director of Youth Ministry: St James & Good Shepherd Parishes Menomonee Falls
                                                      ramseyb@archmil.org or 262-253-2238

                                                                      Claire Hoffmeyer
                                                         Associate Director of Youth Minstry
                                                         St. John Vianney Parish Brookfield, WI
                                                          262-796-3944 or claireh@stjohnv.org
                                                   
                       

A Vocation To "The Now"

Wednesdays seem to be the most refreshing days for me. This is partly because every Wednesday is when Cor Jesu, a young adult event featuring a Eucharistic Holy Hour and Mass, as well as a social gathering, is held at St. Robert Parish in Shorewood,Wisconsin.

Last night was a special treat as Bishop Hying presided at the Holy Hour and Mass. Bishop Hying is an excellent homilist and his words always bring forth a great sense of gentleness and wisdom. Since yesterday was the Feast of Our Lady of Mount Caramel, Bishop Hying reminded us of her willingness to give all of herself over in order to do the will of God. She lived in the present moment. Never looking back at the past while never looking too much toward the future that she became anxious or afraid of fulfilling her call. She saw the opportunity that God was calling her to and she made the most of it.

Bishop Hying’s homily spoke to me in a very particular way last night. These past few months have been a discernment process of sorts trying find out which direction God wants me to take in my life. I’ve spent time discerning a priestly and religious vocation, as well as discerning marriage, but I haven’t seemed to find an answer quite yet. Bishop Hying spoke during his homily that when discerning a vocation, we often get trapped in looking back at the past or looking towards the future, and that can scare us or cause anxiety. Bishop Hying advised instead that we look to our mother Mary as an example of looking to where God is in the present moment, of having a vocation to “the now”. This requires us to ask, “What is God trying to tell me in this moment? How can I do God’s will in the current situation that I am in?” 

We as humans always want to do big things in life especially for God. We often forget that God gives us little challenges to accomplish first before we are even close to being ready for bigger obstacles. We need to ask ourselves how we can live up to the call of a vocation to holiness before anything else. What do we have to lose? We need to focus on having a vocation in the present moment, seeking out God’s will for us in our everyday lives.